


Forging New Bonds

by NightPurity



Category: Voltron: Legendary Defender
Genre: Allura and Lance are Siblings, Altean lance, Alteans Age differently, Alteans dont care about gender, Betrayal, Bonding through pasts, Difficulty trusting, Implied one-sided Zarkon/Lance, Lance's orignal name is Allar, Learning to trust, Lions and Paladins Can Share Pain and Feelings, M/M, Minor Character Death, Mutual Pinning, Nightmares, Past Blue Paladin Lance, Past Paladins - Freeform, Prince Lance - Freeform, Sentient Lions, Shance Big Bang 2017, Subtle mention of Heith, Though subtly, age gap, emotional distress, hidden identity, shance
Language: English
Status: Completed
Published: 2017-11-17
Updated: 2017-11-17
Packaged: 2019-02-03 16:14:05
Rating: Teen And Up Audiences
Warnings: No Archive Warnings Apply
Chapters: 1
Words: 8,385
Publisher: archiveofourown.org
Story URL: https://archiveofourown.org/works/12751752
Author URL: https://archiveofourown.org/users/NightPurity/pseuds/NightPurity
Summary: Despite everything, battles he fought, alliances that were set, he hadn’t thought anything would change. He had never thought everything he knew and loved would be ripped out from under him.Once beautiful gardens full of vibrant life, now crushed and charred, lilac stained everywhere and remains of the current battle shattering the once beautiful image of Altea.He was Allar, the second child to King Alfor, he was prince of Altea, blue paladin of Voltron.And now, he was no longer Allar, but Lance.Everything he lost, and everything that was taken from him by the one he trusted the most. Everything he thought was gone, and now, he was being thrust back into war, against the final thread of a bond he still had left from his past.Back into fighting Zarkon’s hold on him, and trusting his new black paladin, hiding everything he is and was.Allar failed the first time, but Lance would not.





	Forging New Bonds

**Author's Note:**

> Hoo boy, Shance Big Bang fic.
> 
> This was probably awful, but eyyy fun to write.

(Check out a-strange-1ne's [artwork!](https://a-strange-1ne.tumblr.com/post/167598260224/hello-shance-fans-out-there-thank-you-for-tuning))

 

_It wasn’t as if things would get exciting_ , he had said, but as he watched his kingdom fall, those he knew and loved being killed, Allar knew nothing would ever be the same. Rushing through the castle, he headed for his lion. He needed to protect Altea at any cost, and more than that, his sister.

 

She was to rise and take the throne one day, and now, as Altean bodies littered the ground, lilac covering the white stone paths, Allar didn’t think she would get that chance. Leaving the garden, Allar barely managed to catch the bleeding warrior as she bumped into him. Holding her steady, he eased them against a wall in the hallway, ripping his jacket to provide some type of bandage for her, but lilac continued to spill from her wound. Applying pressure, the warrior came to again, pushing slightly bloody hands against his shoulders.

 

“You have to l-leave, Prince.” She murmured, pushing more roughly when Allar refused to move. He ignored the lilac handprints she left, as he caught her when she lost her consciousness.

 

He couldn’t leave, not yet.

 

These were his people, those he was meant to protect.

 

Then storming and shouting entered the halls, and just by the language, Allar knew it wasn’t Alteans. Heaving up the warriors form, Allar hurried down the hall, meeting more warriors and medics on the way. He handed off the warrior, the fear and worry he felt never left him, even as he handed the woman off. He wasn’t going to be any help to them now, not until he had his armor and bayard.

 

Following the directions he was given, Allar headed to the control room. His sister was talking with his father in hurried and worried voices, they were using bits and pieces of the common tongue and their own language. Hurrying up to his father, he waved off his sister’s concerns about his wounds. They were nothing, he faired much worse in battle with Makita on a mission with Talen.

 

“Allar-”

 

“Father, we can’t hold them off much longer.” Allar interrupted his sister, knowing she wouldn’t be happy with him. She was scared, but she was also the princess. She needed to be safe, and Allar would do all he could to protect her.

 

“I know Allar, my only son.” Alfor said, setting a heavy hand on Allar’s shoulder, no words needed to be exchanged, Allar knew what must be done.

 

Whirling around, Allar caught Allura in his arms, hugging her to him as she cried. They weren’t children anymore, they were still young, but they were Alteans, and they were trained to have a way of defense since they were small, despite being diplomats, Alteans must be prepared for traps and any sudden attacks during diplomatic missions.

 

“Zarkon won’t stop at anything, Allura… I’m sorry dear sister.” Allar said, pulling back enough to see her teary and glittering blue and pink eyes. She looked so much like their mother, and he hated to know how much he’d be hurting her.

 

“Allar? What-Allar!” Allura’s eyes were widened with shock and hurt as Allar pushed her back, the cryopod closing on her. Only a few quintents ago, they were sitting in the garden, Allar telling Allura about the battles he and his team did, about the many planets they seen.

 

But now, nothing was the same. The entire planet was under attack by one they trusted so closely. Allar’s brother in arms and once beloved and trusted leader was turning on them, he had already taken Makita, the red lion left without her paladin, and Allar looked to his father sadly. He knew full well there was no chance of victory, many alteans have already been evacuated, sent to planets they could hide and blend into. Many moving to hide from Zarkon in order to escape.

 

Allar knew full well what his father did, that only a few of their race would survive, and only so if they remained in hiding. Looking to his father’s advisor, and his caretaker since he lost his mother as a child, Allar didn’t let his emotions show on his face.

 

He was a warrior, trained to fight since he first began walking, taught many languages since he could first speak, then to read many different scripts when he first learned to read. He was the Prince of Altea, second child to King Alfor and since birth, given the duty to protect his sister and travel for diplomatic purposes, and since the birth of Voltron, destined to be the blue paladin.

 

Turning to his father, Allar gave the altean he shared many traits with a grim smile. He felt bad, as he turned to see Coran being ushered into the cryopod, being put into a cryosleep to later protect his sister. That hurt Allar greatly, to know he would most likely not be with his sister when she woke.

 

“Allar, my son, it is time.” Alfor was mighty and regal, even as his kingdom and civilization fell all around him. Allar nodded, briefly hugging his father one last time, before he left the room, calling through his bond to get his lion.

 

He was Allar of Altea, second child to King Alfor of Altea, and the Blue paladin of Voltron.

 

Rushing to meet his lion in the garden, Allar felt his stomach sink when he narrowly avoided stepping on the fallen warriors he had just seen alive only vargas ago on his way to his father. Lilac soaked the once beautiful castle halls, and fire and bodies tainted the once vibrant gardens. The juneberries were trampled or covered by the fallen, and as he ran to the mighty blue lion he was tied to, Allar turned back to see his once beautiful and beloved planet suffering. Entering the blue lion, Allar sat in the pilot's seat, his lion purring in encouragement.

 

Then, he was leaving his planet behind, seeing the green and yellow lions each separating all in opposite directions he was going. Pulling up the comms, Allar gave a final smile to his remaining team. Talen gave him a bitter and affectionate smile, his race was very similar to Alteans, they had similar shape, but their skin had slight scaled patches and bright glowing eyes, they also were built more muscular than others. Talen’s hair was singed slightly, the dark brown of it stained with the bright yellow of his species blood. His silver eyes were filled with acceptance at what they were doing. Just like Allar, he knew there was no victory for them, they couldn’t fight their past leader.

 

Pitaya was faring no better, they were brushing their indigo hair out of their face, feathers had been ripped from their cheeks and some of their collarbone from where it once rested in fluffy patches, and their wings were broken. Allar met each of their eyes as he took a deep breath, then sitting straight and looking at them each in the eyes firmly, Allar felt as if his father was sitting right beside him.

 

“Blue paladin, Allar of Altea, son of Alfor, and Prince of Altea. _Adem Na_.” He said, and from the slight tears in Talen’s eyes, he knew the implications.

 

_We die before we give up our lions and our vows._

 

“Yellow paladin, Talen of Aliak, son of Myan, Warrior of Ki’val. _Adem Na_.” Talen whispered, a slightly clawed hand coming to rest right above the center of his chest, where his heart was.

 

“Green paladin, Pitaya of Jeieta, child of K’la, Heir to Cirav. _Adem Na_.” Pitaya said, putting a slightly green stained feathered hand to their chest. Following their movements, Allar did the same, his ripped sleeve revealing his blue markings down his arm, delicate but each telling of his birthright, his heritage, and his destiny. Every Altean is born with markings on their body, each marking telling of their heritage, of their families, of their futures.

 

Closing his blue eyes, Allar gave one last sentence to his closest friends, and his fellow paladins.

 

“In which we vowed our lives, _Adem Na_ , my siblings in arms, never shall we give what we sworn to protect. _Mitai_.”

 

“ _Mitai_.”

 

That was the last Allar would see of his fellow paladins. Talen successfully hid the yellow lion on a new planet in a far off solar system, still primitive as it is just within its first birth, only recently entering the universe. Talen, however, died on the new and unknown planet, his quintessence leaving his body and going into the ritual marking he had done, to wait to claim a new paladin.

 

Pitaya hid the green lion on a small planet, only a few hundred cycles around it’s sun. Pitaya set the ritual markings as well, living only a short decathebe longer, the locals set to keeping the lion hidden for the many years to follow until a new paladin claimed Pitaya’s place.

 

Allar travelled to the opposite side of the universe from Altea, hiding on a very new and primitive planet. Resting on the planet, it’s odd beasts and lack of capable intelligence far too unsafe for the injured prince, the blue lion decided. Hidden in a cave, Allar was set into a cryo sleep, the many years that past building a canyon and desert around the blue lion’s hiding place.

 

Allar would not wake for nearly ten thousand years, only waking a few decathebes before he was thrust back into what he was forced to flee. It was nothing more than a short blip in his life, one dobash, he was on Altea, the next, he was on a planet that spent too much time fighting itself rather than the search for knowledge. The species had pitifully short lives, and their planet’s cycle was shorter than Altea’s by a bit, though without any knowledge on their planet, Allar couldn’t be sure.

 

He learned from observing that there were two biological sexes, male and female, unlike Altean’s who were born one sex, but could change gender depending on their life partners. They seemed to separate based on these born genders, and Allar couldn’t fathom how it was important at all, wasn’t one who they decided to be?

 

These odd creatures were rather strange with hideous ears and it was hard to tell their gender at first and they spent a lot of their time fighting against each other. He also found that they didn’t even know all of what was on their own planet.

 

Allar spent the rest of his young teen years, barely gracing his late teen in Altean terms, learning and studying the planets race. He changed his body and shape to match that of the humans (missing his long silver hair, the last of few traits he held with his father), then travelled to learn more, finding it odd that this one planet had multiple languages, a strange version of the Common tongue he knew from his studies.

 

Their languages were simple, and easy enough to learn, and their current way of learning was rather pitiful and primitive, the way they taught some of their ‘subjects’ was making him glad his studies were done by Coran and top scholars. It was boring and frustrating to deal with their odd cultures and primitive kind.

 

He was a diplomat, however, so he knew that he’d need to respect the cultures of the planet, and its people. Not only for his safety, but Blue’s as well. There was such a fear of the unknown, that it was far too risky to reveal his heritage and where he came from.

 

He figured it out over time, then was adopted into a family because his age was equivalent to that of one of their adolescents of their species. Hiding his true identity and species was easy, he had observed enough to know telling them what he really was would be bad, and then Prince Allar was no more, locked away inside while he tried to find his way back to Blue, their bond strong, but he was lost from his travelling, having forgot he didn’t have his armor and bayard, only able to feel for Blue.

 

Thus, Lance was born, and Prince Allar put to sleep until the day he managed to return to space. He couldn’t risk bringing Blue out of hiding, he didn’t know how much time has passed since he left Altea, so he could only focus on the Garrison to return to space. He had followed his bond with Blue there, but he needed to get into space, to try to get to one of Altea’s allied planets and return home.

 

Blue would be safer here, where no one in the universe even bothered with. A perfect blip in the universe of no real interest to any other species. Surrounded by the ritual markings, his quintessence flowing within each marking, waiting for the day a new blue paladin would be claimed, however, he knew no one would be claimed, the Blue lion was loyal, and the day she chose a new paladin, would be long after her paladin’s death in order to grieve.

 

He then stayed with his adoptive family, ones that pained him to love and worry over due to the loss of his birth family, he had no way to know if his father survived, or that his sister’s cryopod was still intact and functional. They didn’t seem to mind him, and when he was sent off to the Garrison, a step closer to returning to space, he realized just how compassionate some of them could be.

 

He was not born to them, yet they still treated him as if he was their blood. He was greatly older than the many of them by time cycles, yet they still made him feel like the young man he was, in converting his age to match that of what he would be had he been human. He would admit to becoming teary eyed when he was being seen off, he would want nothing more to remain with them, but if he did, then they would realize that he wasn’t like them.

 

His adoptive parents would grow old in a few of the planets cycles, but he would not change very much. He may grow a little taller, maybe his hair would grow out to it’s long length it was before, maybe he would become even more mature, but he would ultimately not change much, while they would wilt, their skin becoming loose as their life reached it’s end.

 

He learned from observing them that they aged and changed a lot quicker than alteans, his youngest adopted sister, the one that reminded him so much of Allura at that size and mentality, would grow up, become an adult for her species, start a family, grow old, and then die, while he would have barely changed. To him, it would be nothing more than a few age bumps, bringing him closer to being a full altean adult, while she would have already reached all stages of her life.

 

So, as he waved goodbye to them, he tried not to think about how much pain he would cause them when he left. He tried not to feel guilty that they cared and housed him, despite that he didn’t change much at all, he tried not to think that they still loved him, even though they probably figured he was different.

 

Then he made it to the Garrison, the technology was so primitive and odd compared to the advanced altean technology he was born and raised with. He struggled with the simulators, their tech difficult to understand, having been used to so much more advanced material, and that their machines didn’t bond with quintessence like altean tech and machines did.

 

He had startled when he felt the tugging and near violent yanks from his bond with Blue, she was calling for him, having waited many decathebes to have him return from his observation and exploration of the planet and its species.

 

She did not want him to leave her, she wanted him safe with her. He knew if he went to where she was, hidden in the caves, he would not be able to leave her. Their bond was strong, and though the blue lion was the friendliest, she was the most loyal. Nothing would stand between their bond, nothing ever could. She was the only bond he had left, having woke from his cryosleep to feel the emptiness from where his bond with his previous teammates had been. It was an ache, an empty feeling of loss, but not the burning and frighteningly painful tear from when he _felt_ his bond with Makita shatter, from when his own trusted and beloved leader took her life, and kept Red locked away.

 

Lance, a name he now called himself until the day he returned to where he belonged, or death claimed him, hummed a bit in response to Blue’s crying. He knew she was worried and alone, she was very trusting, but only she was awake to see the changes of this planet over ten thousand years. Lance had originally thought the planet was not interesting to any other species, but he recognized a few of the species in Earth’s history. Some having helped humans a little in the past, only to never return, and Lance figured he knew why.

 

There was one human he didn’t like, something about him just rubbed Lance the wrong way and Blue often pointed out that it might be because of Makita. Keith, he was called, was brash and hotheaded, but still had that instinctive and reckless prowess that Makita had.

 

Lance sat up, the beds they had were odd, and not as soft and flowing as what he had used when he slept in his room in the kingdom, it was quiet, no noise from Talen or Pitaya fiddling with something they know they shouldn’t mess with, no warmth from Zarkon as he slept nearby, no murmuring of soft stories from Makita.

 

The human he shared a room with, Hunk, was snoring slightly, and odd thing because Alteans didn’t make such a sound in sleep. Shrugging off the sheets, Lance pulled on his clothing, simple clothing he wore that his adoptive family had given him, and woke Hunk up. He wanted to leave the Garrison, they would sneak back in later, but Lance hated being trapped in there. He knew full well that a lot was being hidden from them by the instructors, but he also knew better than to get too involved.

 

When the Kerberos team disappeared, Lance knew full well that it was covered up. Blue’s restlessness at the time made it clear something else happened. He wanted to know what happened to the crew, the scientist and his son, the pilot, three highly capable humans.

 

Intelligent, capable humans with better knowledge of their technology than they seemed aware of. Lance admired them, admired the knowledge they held, admired the pacifist nature the had shown in the brief moments he seen them.

 

Something was off and it nagged at Lance, loud and demanding that he look, but Lance knew better than to investigate or pry when he was unlikely to get much, or away, with it.

 

They had been in the middle of sneaking out, planning to head to town under false pretense of flirting and messing around in town while Hunk complained about it. The teen was far too much of a worrier. Talen was similar in some ways, though unlike Hunk, Talen was easily swayed into following with the determination not to let them get caught.

 

Lance had snuck out of the Altean castle many times, his stealth was really well, being far so used to having to remain silent when he was on missions with his team, having to sneak up on their attackers.

 

Spotting the small human teen, Pidge, sneaking out of a room, Lance spied the rather heavy set backpack on their back. Changing plans, Lance headed to follow Pidge instead, he couldn’t risk Pidge wanting to run away like Keith had, that made problems for Lance’s plan to return to space.

 

It wasn’t until he realized with the rather strange and messy technology Pidge had, that Lance found he was returning to space earlier than expected. Blue was calling more desperately, and Lance could feel her reaching out for someone else.

 

She did that often, there was someone she was pulling towards herself, but she never let them discover her. Lance stiffened when he felt Blue’s mind brush against his, Pidge was talking about something, but Lance was more focused on Blue.

 

_Something was coming._

  
Jolting, Lance felt his heart nearly stop when Pidge mentioned Voltron, his soul aching in sadness and loss from the emptiness of his previous bonds. His friends, his siblings in arms, his family was gone. The weak thread he still felt connected to him didn’t change that feeling, only making it worse.

 

Of course the only one still bonded to him, was the very one who ripped his bonds away from him. Watching as a pod fell from the sky, Lance tensed, the pod was Galra, and it was an escape pod nonetheless.

 

It was suspicious, and as they got closer to see the Garrison already surrounding and examining it, Lance realized _why_ Blue was calling more urgently now.

 

The Galra were moving towards earth. Takashi Shirogane, youngest pilot to graduate from the Garrison and one of the best pilots earth had to offer, the very one who disappeared a human year ago was currently strapped down while they sedated him. He came from a Galra escape pod, and though Lance was greatly pleased to know it wasn’t Galra, he had many questions.

 

More importantly, Shiro was warning them of something coming, of the _Galra_ coming, and Lance couldn’t help but chase the need to help, to save him and protect.

 

The foolish scientist ignored Shiro’s warnings, ignored the very real fear in the human’s eyes and focused more on poking and prodding at the human, one who just looking at, Lance knew must have dealt with something so harsh.

 

Then Keith came, and that bitterness returned. Blue told him that it was his grief, but he couldn’t accept that. Makita died decathebes ago, during the attack on Altea. He was not grieving for her, and yet, he was.

 

Now, as Lance stood in the shack Keith had been living in, looking over the papers and board Keith had while said person was outside with Shiro. Lance felt his stomach sink when he noticed some of the legible notes.

 

Keith knew where Blue was, but he hasn’t yet _found_ her. Closing his eyes, Lance turned to the door as it opened, Shiro walked in and Lance flinched, though subtly. He claimed Shiro was his ‘hero’ and it was more because Shiro reminded him of his previous leader, back before his team was ripped away from him by disaster and betrayal.

 

And yet, Lance felt something else reaching for the other, but he shook it off and ignored it, fighting the pulling the best he could. Reaching out, Lance spotted Shiro’s Galra arm, feeling sad for the teen, before gripping it firmly to shake.

 

He could only imagine what was done to cause such a change in the human teen, could only ache for what he must have suffered. There was nothing he could do right now, nothing any of them could do when not even Shiro could remember what he suffered.

 

Having seen Lance have no problem with Shiro’s new arm, the others were quick to follow. Turning as Keith began talking, Lance made a few comments, anything to try to throw off Keith’s trail to Blue.

 

Then Shiro brought up the Galra. They were looking for Blue, and found her. If they wanted to protect Earth, Lance had to return to his beloved lioness. He was worried though, because if he could still feel that thread of bond he had left, it was only a short matter of time before they would be found.

 

Lance bit back a laugh as he fell down through the floor, the water carrying him and the others to Blue. She was impatient and immediately activated the markings, reaffirming their bond. As they landed in the pool of the water, Lance got up, walking towards Blue, despite the other’s wariness.

 

Making a vague comment about how Blue was watching him, Lance immediately felt her push into his mind, showing her fellow lions combining to make Voltron. Only, Lance had to weakly nod.

 

They’ve been chosen, and now, Lance was returning to what he had been escaping from, and Shiro was no better off.

 

Blue, rather happy to finally be out of the cave, purred happily. Lance had felt her nearly fully meld with him, only barely being able to stop it. He didn’t want to let them know he wasn’t human, and if he fully bonded with Blue, it would show. He knew far too well his eyes would glow a blinding blue, his silver-currently brown- hair would tint blue, and his quintessence would mix with hers. Pitaya often brought up he and Zarkon were the only ones who looked like that when melding fully with their lions.

 

That ache grew stronger.

 

But he couldn’t, not with them there, not with them being chased by Galra. He used his quintessence and mixed a bit with Blue, opening a wormhole as he turned to the others. He felt a little regret, not much, but a little when he snapped at Hunk for suggesting they give the Galra Blue. He’d never give up Blue, he left his father to Zarkon to protect her, and the universe, he would not waste what time he spent protecting her only to hand her over to the one who stole everything from him.

 

After going through the wormhole, Lance was left in awe. The planet wasn’t Altea, but the castle of lions was there, still mighty as ever, though the surrounding castle and gardens were gone, left behind on Altea most likely. Lance went into the castle, being scanned before his quintessence was recognized and they were being lead to the control room, where Lance knew his sister and Coran would be. It was unsettling to see the silence of the castle, the lilac blood of his people no longer staining the walls or floor, and no corpses littered the ground. It was odd, he would assume there would still be some signs of the battle.

 

Then, the pods lifted, and Lance felt his breath catch.

 

“Are they… dead?” Hunk questioned, and then, like the breath of a wisting meklan, the pod glass opened and Allura, still looking exactly like she did the day he shoved her into a pod, fell into his arms. It stole his breath away to see her still exactly as he remembered.

 

“Your ears…” Allura started and Lance blinked, confused, his ears? What was wrong with them?

 

“They’re hideous.” Allura stated and Lance immediately scowled at her. How dare she? He saved her life, and they finally reunite and she insults him?

 

“There is nothing wrong with them, and they heard that!” Lance hissed, and when Allura narrowed her eyes and moved to pin him, Lance spun from her hands, trapping them behind her back on instinct, only vaguely glad he wasn’t holding his bayard, afraid he would have hurt her.

 

“Calm down.” Lance said, releasing her as she demanded to know why they were here, and where their father was. It wasn’t until Coran fell from his pod, nearly ramming into Lance and immediately assuming they were enemy combatants that Lance realized…

 

He still looked like Lance, not Allar, his long silver hair that used to be tied in a loose band and tossed over one shoulder was cut short and his hair was now brown, his blue and silver thin pupiled eyes were now a dull blue, and his markings were hidden with his blending in as a human.

 

“Allura, calm down.” Lance said, disregarding Coran for now. Lance felt a little bad for cutting Shiro off, turning to face Allura instead, only for his eyes to widen in horror.

 

‘ _Ten… Ten thousand years_?’ Lance shrieked in his mind, rushing over to the controls and feeling his stomach sink. No wonder there was just an empty feeling for Pitaya and Talen’s bonds when he woke, they had long since passed on while he was in cryosleep. Allura turned to him, her eyes narrowed in suspicion before Lance slouched a little, pulling back. He couldn’t face her, he couldn’t tell her. He failed.

 

He couldn’t, he had no right to. Not when he failed her, his team, their people.

 

“Who are you?” She demanded, and Shiro went into introductions, introducing himself and Keith, before Hunk took over and introduced the rest. However, when he introduced Lance, the secret Altean bit back the urge to tell them who he was, to ensure them they weren’t the last Alteans.

 

Lance bit his tongue, standing tall and facing his bewildered sister, feeling regret at hiding from his dear sister. He couldn’t risk any chances his sister would ask questions he couldn’t tell her answers to… He couldn’t tell her who he was, or that he was still bonded to Zarkon.

 

He was afraid, he’ll admit that, of there being distrust, of them assuming his bond with Zarkon could pull him away. Irrational, he knew, but fear and logic tended to not get along. Besides, he knew his sister did not fully understand the bonds of paladins, let alone the humans.

 

It was a game of trust and distrust.

 

“What the hell is going on?” Keith demanded, ever the impatient one, and Lance bit back a snarky response. He wasn’t used to how similar Keith was to Makita, and still bitterly snapped at him from having been unable to grieve as he had for Talen and Pitaya, their bonds being severed while he was in cryosleep. Even so, he found himself picking apart Keith, and how different he was to Makita, how different they all were to his previous team.

 

It wasn’t fair for him to judge, let alone compare them to those he lost.

 

“...” Allura moved on to explain to the group, and Lance winced, gripping his chest and feeling his lingering thread of a bond tighten. It made his stomach queasy and his face pale, it was nothing like the soothing warmth and comfort it once was.

 

Zarkon was pulling at their bond, and Lance felt himself clench his fist.

 

_He knew_.

 

~

 

It wasn’t until Sendak attacked and caught sight of Lance, that Lance knew things would get worse. After protecting Coran from the false Rover, Lance was barely conscious when he and Shiro were trapped with Sendak, and he narrowly regained consciousness when Sendak was talking with Zarkon.

 

“-I have also captured the Black and Blue paladins.” Sendak reported, stepping to the side to reveal Lance and Shiro. Meeting Zarkon’s gaze, Lance felt his body stiffen.

 

Gone was the handsome look Zarkon used to have, his skin leathery instead of the soft and well cared for fur he used to have, his voice was harder and more raspy, and his eyes were no longer the soft glowing yellow Lance remembered, and the scar Lance remembered Makita giving him before her demise still lingered on Zarkon’s face.

 

“Well done. It won’t be long before I have you back, my blue paladin.” Zarkon grumbled out and Lance pushed his back into the metal behind him. He wouldn’t, he wasn’t Zarkon’s, he would never go to him. After having cut the call, Lance felt his body wracked with pain as he was knocked out.

 

He only vaguely heard Shiro yell, almost nothing more than fear and a trick of a mind before everything fell.

 

_The Black and Blue paladins have always shared a rather strong bond, always deeper than any of the other bonds… Zarkon wants his Blue paladin, Voltron as well, but he had also been searching for his missing Blue paladin, one who was gone for ten thousand years, but not dead because the thread of a bond was still there._

 

Zarkon grinned darkly at the abyss of space. He knew they had formed Voltron, and it angered him to know that Champion was setting a bond with _his_ blue paladin. He still felt his bond with Allar though, and seeing Sendak had his blue paladin, Zarkon let himself feel slightly victorious.

 

It wasn’t always like that, but the blue paladin did bond the strongest and most, their quintessence flowing between the bonds and connecting them as a whole, much like the black paladin connected their minds. It was a given that the black paladin and blue paladin would bond the strongest, sometimes it was deep too, and after ten thousand years, when the other bonds he had died and shattered, a numb pain that ached no matter how much he ignored it, the bond weakened, but relentlessly held. The blue paladin would be his, and this time, he wouldn’t let him escape.

 

The others didn’t understand his quest for power, but he couldn’t bring himself to end Allar. Their bond was much deeper than the others, and Zarkon was not letting his blue paladin get away.

 

He would take his blue paladin back, and rid the universe of the paladin trying to steal his lion and his blue paladin.

 

The cold grip of their bond, something once so warm, was now a cruel reminder that he was still tied to the one who took everything from him. Zarkon spent ten thousand years taking and destroying, and it was frightening to know... Zarkon didn't want him dead, he wanted _him_. There was no escaping-but he couldn't just give up what his sibling in arms gave their lives for, what he vowed to protect.

 

Glancing down at his hands, Lance hesitated before getting up and locking his door and heading to the conjoined bathroom. Facing the mirror, he hesitated once more, before going through and fully facing the mirror.

 

It's been many decathebes, so long, he wondered if he still looked altean-if he still looked like Allar, the prince who failed his civilization-his people.

 

Slowly, brown hair turned white, skin revealing scars from back then, blue markings kissing his cheeks, and bright blue eyes. He ran his fingers through his white locks, sighing as they easily combed through the strands. Long hair, now short, and even then, there was no mistaking who he was.

 

Not when his arms and sides told stories, markings reminding him and any other who knew of Alteans, that he was a prince, that his life was put down on his skin.

 

Who was he? He wasn't Allar any longer, he was no longer the prince of Altea, he was no longer the second child of Alfor, he was no longer the sibling to Allura. He was still, however, the blue paladin.

 

Watching as his fingers brushed over his markings, his life story, Lance wondered idly if he could tell what would come next…

 

Shaking his head, Lance let out a shaky breath, eyeing himself in the mirror. Oh how long it’s been since he’s seen that face staring back.

 

Returning to his human look, Lance didn't want to dwell on it. Most alteans had a story on their skin, their lives painted out on their bodies. They didn't always know exactly what would happen, but they had a grasp of it. Lance ran his fingers lightly over his skin, over the places his marks were, breath hitching as his fingers stopped and trembled over where he _knew_ Zarkon’s betrayal was.

 

Foreboding it once was, a cruel and painful reminder it remained.

 

Lance turned to get dressed into his armor, he was too on edge after losing his previous team, his past family.

 

Everything he had taken by Zarkon, who now wants him and his lion. Wincing, Lance rubbed the spot where his markings where, all his life story, hidden beneath the human form he took.

 

Everything he lost, every bond, every relationship, friendship… Family…

 

Zarkon took it all from him.

 

Clenching his fist, Lance fought against his swirling emotions, against the pain and betrayal, the fear, the _hurt_. Lance lost everything, and suddenly, so much was being thrust into his arms.

 

And Voltron-

 

_Voltron and it’s new paladins-his new team_.

 

Taking a deep breath, Lance repeated the words of Makita’s races’ most treasured scripture. A way of calming, a focus to fool the fear into bravery, to build up to confidence that in time would become true.

 

Makita had always said that.

 

Even now, he believed it with all his heart.

 

“ _Trust in yourself, trust in your arms to hold you up, your legs to move you forward. Trust your heart to never fail you. We are strong, because we feel, and our feelings do not steer us wrong. Remember what is real, and what is not.”_

 

Turning to his door, Lance shook off any outward indication of his thoughts. He was Lance, he no longer deserved to call himself Allar. He failed his people, his team, his family.

 

He would not this time.

 

“Ah, Lance, good morning.” Oh no, no, no no no no. Lance was not ready for this, turning to meet the silver eyes of the new black paladin, Lance returned the greeting, smile tense. _He’s the black paladin, he won’t hurt you, or them… He is safe-_ **_so was Zarkon_ ** _-NO! No, Zarkon lied, Zarkon is not Shiro, trust in your team Lance, trust in your feelings. Do not fail them again. Shiro is good, safe, warmer, softer, kinder. Zarkon had been once, but Shiro does not have that shiver to him. There is only warmth from him… Trust. Trust in him. Trust in yourself._

 

“You okay?” Shiro asked, concern lacing his voice in an oddly firm, but soft way and Lance fought back his panic, his doubts, and his conflicting thoughts. Despite the hurricane of feeling swirling around him, Shiro’s concern made him feel warmer.

 

“I’m fine man, just getting used to the whole ‘saving the universe’ thing.” Lance let out like sickly sweet Nunvil, lies falling from his lips with practiced ease, so simple like second nature. He didn’t want to acknowledge that lying to Shiro made his chest ache.

 

That frightened Lance, he was always honest, honest and loyal, but here he was, lying to his new team, and fighting against his previous black paladin.

 

What had become of him?

 

Shiro showed no indication he was aware of the lie, however the concern did not fade away and that _hurt_ because Lance was scared, scared of this human who was done wrong by Zarkon- as he himself was- and Lance felt his heart sink.

 

He was scared, rightfully so, but so was Shiro, so was their team.

 

They were humans with no previous knowledge of anything outside their own solar system.

 

_They were not trained, they were not prepared for this war._

 

“... Yeah, this was really sudden, but we can’t give up.” Shiro said and Lance turned to look at him- actually _look_ at him, not seeing Zarkon but actually seeing Shiro- the human teen looked lost, afraid even, and despite Lance’s paranoia and fear, he couldn’t help but need to support, to protect and comfort. Talen and Makita often supported their team, when their morale was low, their hope being lost, they were the ones who comforted, who kept them strong.

 

But right now, Lance had to be that pillar of support.

 

“Hey, we can do this. We have each other.” Lance had set his hand on Shiro’s shoulder, and as Shiro sent a small, thankful, smile at him, he felt all his fears and worry pass, even if for the moment.

 

As if, everything was still and calm, his distrust faded and though he knew it would be there, this was entirely new.

 

He wasn’t ready to trust his new team yet, but he would have to try. They were terrified, and while Lance had previous knowledge of some parts of the universe, these beings did not.

 

“Thank you Lance.” Shiro had put a hand briefly to his, and suddenly pulled away, thought Lance didn’t know why, he wasn’t going to push. Unlike his previous team, they hadn’t spent years training and fighting together, this wasn’t his previous team and he couldn’t keep expecting them to be like it.

 

They had to set up their own roles in this team, they had to figure out how much they wanted to share, and how much they wouldn’t. They were going to learn new boundaries, and have to bond.

 

Lance wasn’t ready for it, but right now, there wasn’t a chance to take his time.

 

“Let’s head to the control room.” Shiro’s voice broke Lance out of his thoughts, and sending a smile to the black paladin, Lance followed.

 

Of course, for all the great leader qualities his sister had been trained with, and how much she had been prepared for the day she would rule, she also had a lot to learn.

 

Immediately, she was trying to get them to form Voltron easier, and thankfully she wasn’t making them mind meld again, she couldn’t force their bonds. He, Shiro, and Hunk looked for the most part disbelieving. Pidge didn’t seem to be reacting much, if anything they seemed tired, and Keith… Keith looked grumpy as usual.

 

Even leaning against Hunk and looking ridiculously tiny compared to the bigger teen, Keith still held that grumpy scowl.

 

Blue chided him for his bitterness, though her worry had eased when Lance’s observations of the others had tinged with a fondness Lance was unaware he felt.

 

While he couldn’t help but notice that all though this new team was similar, they were so vastly different from his past team and all unique on their own. Glancing up, Lance met the gray eyes of Shiro, who smiled encouragingly and squeezed his shoulder, before they both returned to Allura.

 

Lance felt better, and it scared him. The black and blue paladins have always bonded strongly, and with no real prior interaction before being thrust back into war, it scared Lance how quickly he was getting close to the new paladins.

 

To his new black paladin.

 

He didn’t want to strain his bonds with them because of a fear of betrayal, but someone who had fought with him and protected him for so long had turned against him.

 

Lance wanted to believe this team wouldn’t.

 

It wasn’t that Lance disliked his team, or hated Shiro, it was just, so difficult to overcome Zarkon’s betrayal.

 

He wanted to hate Zarkon, to despise him for taking everything from him, for causing so much death and destruction. He wanted to hate him, to cut that bond with him.

 

_It hurt so much_.

 

Shiro wasn’t Zarkon, Shiro wasn’t someone who would betray him. Lance desperately tried to convince himself that Zarkon was evil, that it was just Zarkon, that no one else would do that.

 

_He was still afraid. Afraid to be hurt and broken all over again._

 

Shiro was kind, supportive, and sometimes it bothered Lance how distant he could be, but maybe that was for the best. Maybe those unfamiliar and terrifying feelings would fade if Shiro kept that distance.

 

Of course, that was asking too much wasn’t it?

 

“You’re up rather late.” Lance jolted and spun around to face Shiro, despite how difficult it is to hide his heritage from them all, Coran knew, and Lance couldn’t shake the hurt and guilt of having hid that from the man who was there for him and Allura for so long. Coran said he understood, and didn’t mention it to anyone else, but Lance could see the hope in Coran’s eyes that Lance would tell the others.

 

Hope that Lance could take a step forward into trusting.

 

“Uh, Yeah… A little homesick.” Lance said, voice soft though they could be yelling and no one else would hear. Altean tech was rather adept.

 

That’s what made it so easy for Zarkon to betray them.

 

_Not the time Lance, stop it._

 

“Yeah… We were all thrust into this pretty suddenly.” Shiro said, and Lance bit his lip, wanting to explain that they wouldn’t be stuck in space if Lance could have seen it sooner, could have stopped Zarkon before all this happened.

 

“ _It is no use to worry of such things, no point in dwelling on past actions and memories. We only need to move forward_.” Pitaya had told him that, back during one of their first missions and they couldn’t leave without dirtying their hands.

 

Glancing over to Shiro, Lance sighed and leaned back on his hands. It was quiet for a moment, before Shiro spoke.

 

“This war… It’s terrifying. Everything just, it’s terrifying. We’re, we’re all in so much danger.” Shiro whispered and Lance’s breath hitched, his blue eyes meeting that of Shiro’s gray, a weary human teen, weighed down by the past and the future, held down by the chains of war with so much fear and responsibility shackling him.

 

This war, this 10,000 year old nightmare was hurting them all, weighing them down with fear of the unknown, of the nagging doubt they would be able to stop it.

 

“Ta… A close friend once told me, ‘ _No matter the fear that binds us, no matter the doubts that take a hold, we can break those binds and face anything. We have each other to stay standing, that’s all we need.’_ I didn’t think too much into his words… But I guess, now it kind of makes sense, doesn’t it?” Lance let out a weak smile, those fears kept nagging at him, that horrible thread kept yanking, and the new bonds Lance held, they were so different but comforting.

 

It was frightening, but Shiro was there for him, even if all Shiro could do was smile softly and firmly grip his shoulder. Shiro wasn’t Zarkon, and even though Lance’s fears and past are more binds holding him- Shiro was here, someone who has met the cruelty Zarkon displayed, and still fights against him.

 

Someone who understood the pain Zarkon caused.

 

“That friend… That friend is right. We have each other, we’ll support and hold each other up.” Shiro said, smiling softly at Lance.

 

His heart _leapt_.

 

Shiro got up, and on whim, Lance reached out and caught his metal arm. It was selfish, but when Shiro was around, he could almost pretend he isn’t still bonded to Zarkon, that the aching tugs on his thread of a bond to Zarkon wasn’t there, Shiro’s comforting warmth and protective blanket of a bond pushed away the cold of Zarkon’s hold. Something must have shown on his face, because Shiro’s eyes softened and he sat back down, this time, their shoulders pressing together.

 

Lance wanted to trust him, to believe he wouldn’t be like Zarkon. He wanted to shove away all the fears and doubts Zarkon gave him, to be able to fully trust his teammates.

 

Biting his lip, Lance didn’t really know what to say, he didn’t know how to put it into words, all he knew was he was _scared_ and he already trusted Shiro a frighteningly good amount.

 

He shouldn’t be trusting him so much, especially since his last black paladin betrayed him and stole everything he loved-

 

“What… What was Sendak talking about? You don’t have-” Lance’s breath caught in his throat as he locked eyes with Shiro, who seemed to be back pedaling if the way the rising panic in his eyes showed.

 

In all honesty, Lance wasn’t even aware Shiro heard any of that, or that Shiro was even conscious at the time.

 

_The yelling, Shiro screaming in pain… He was… he was awake, he knew-_ **_he knew_ **.

 

“It’s fine…”

 

_Trust. Trust, Heart, Bond._ Lance took a deep breath, and following Blue’s encouragement, decided that by now, it might be good to let someone know.

 

He just…. He wasn’t ready for it.

 

Stumbling over his words a few times, Lance realized, he may never be ‘ready’, but he didn’t really have a choice.

 

Shiro…

 

Shiro hasn’t proven himself unworthy of his trust, and though Lance holds his doubts, he _wants_ to trust Shiro. Not just because Shiro is so quiznak-ing nice and helpful or comforting and safe feeling, but also because he doesn’t want to cause a knot in the bonds they have because of his doubts and fear.

 

“It’s okay if you don’t want to Lance, I won’t say anything I promise, I wouldn’t do anything to hurt you.” Maybe it was how sincere Shiro looked, maybe it was Blue’s nudging him that had him pulling Shiro down and slumping against the other a bit.

 

He couldn’t hide it forever, and maybe it would be okay if Shiro knew… Well, Shiro already knew, but it might be better if he new the whole story, not just the easily twistable words of Sendak.

 

“I’m… I was there.” And Lance couldn’t help it, once he started, he couldn’t stop, not his explanation, his story, or his tears. After a brief moment of worry, Shiro pulled Lance closer and held him to his side as Lance spilled his past, and his fears to him. A few times, when Lance mentioned Zarkon going after him, or Zarkon wanting him back, Shiro’s grip tightened and briefly Shiro interrupted with,

 

“ _He can’t take you, or make you do anything you don’t want to. I won’t allow him to hurt you._ ”

 

Lance couldn’t bother to doubt those words, not when Shiro said them with such a fierce determination to make true on those words.

 

He could try to trust, because Shiro made him realize, it's not wrong to guard oneself, but it is also not wrong to trust in those who want to help.

 

And Voltron’s new paladins, they were fighting a war, fighting something beyond their knowledge, taking their new roles that were thrust onto them in stride.

 

Against his doubts, of the tingling distrust he may always feel, Lance felt grateful.

**Author's Note:**

> Thanks for reading!


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